20 Things Women Do to Men But Don’t Realize It Is a Sexual Harassment The issue of sexual harassment is often seen through the lens of male perpetrators and female victims. While it’s undeniable that this represents a significant proportion of incidents, it’s crucial to recognize that men, too, can be victims of harassment, sometimes in ways society overlooks or downplays.
Unwanted Advances in Public Places
“Some women once tried to take off some of my clothes in a club (without me showing interest in them at all). When I told them to go away after a while, they got angry at me. Never been so confused.”
Ladies, no one likes uninvited advances. It can be confusing, alarming, and downright disrespectful. Always remember personal boundaries are important for everyone, regardless of gender.
Invasion of Personal Space
“As a guy, just because I have long hair doesn’t mean you can walk up to me and run your hands through it when I don’t even know you.”
Physical contact without consent can feel intrusive and uncomfortable. It’s simple – just as you wouldn’t want strangers touching your hair, guys feel the same way.
Rude Actions and Double Standards
“I had a drunk young lady rip my button-up shirt off in a bar on a dance floor and then proceed to cup my privates. I was drunk, so I told her and her friends to go away after I got my shirt back from them, which had all the buttons torn off except the bottom 2. That was super annoying, but I was just going to deal with it until I was asked to leave by the bouncers for yelling at women and not buttoning up my shirt. Another group of women approached me and said they had the whole thing on video, which I then sent to the bar’s management and got a $200 gift certificate for it.”
It’s not okay to violate anyone’s personal space or to rip their clothing. Unfortunately, this man experienced a humiliating situation that was not taken seriously.
Cultural Insensitivity
“Every wedding and funeral I have ever been to as a Scotsman, there is a gaggle of grannies who try to get a look under the kilt at every opportunity.”
Ladies, curiosity is natural, but it should never result in disrespecting someone’s cultural traditions. Let’s be respectful of each other’s backgrounds and personal spaces!
Unwanted Physical Contact
“I’ve been into weightlifting most of my adult life. As a result, my arms and chest are noticeable. I’m not like a bodybuilder or anything, but I’ve got big arms and a protruding chest. Women think they can just grab my arms and rub my chest without permission or warning. I think that they think it’s okay because they compliment me afterward. It makes me uncomfortable.”
Just because someone is muscular does not give anyone the right to touch them without consent. Everyone has the right to their personal space and bodily autonomy.
Workplace Harassment
“I had a girl I used to work with slap my ****, grab my privates, and try to rub herself against me. When I took it to HR, nothing was done about it. A week later, I got written up because she lied and told HR I had verbally abused her.”
This is a clear case of workplace harassment. It’s important to remember that all employees should feel safe and respected at work, regardless of their gender.
Unsolicited Advances at Work
“I was working at a birthday party in a bar once, and a really drunk 40-year-old woman decided to just walk behind the counter and slip a banknote into my shirt. She then started to rub around my chest like some massage, I guess? It was really weird; I stood there confused, waiting for it to end. Her husband was watching the whole time and didn’t seem too happy about the whole thing. But nobody really seemed to care or just laughed about it. As a 40-year-old man, I would’ve gotten one hell of a lawsuit if I had done that to a 17-year-old girl working at a bar.”
People who are working deserve respect. They are there to provide a service, not to be subjected to unwanted advances. It doesn’t matter what your gender is; inappropriate actions are still not okay.
Unwanted Touching
“I once had some chick walk past me and squeeze my privates, and another one slapped my butt, and I’m pretty sure neither knew that that was sexual harassment.”
Nobody should ever touch another person inappropriately without consent. Remember, ‘No’ means ‘No,’ and respect goes both ways!
Disregard for Personal Boundaries
“‘Playfully’ touching me when I keep telling you to knock it off. Contrary to belief, not all of us like that. Respect me as much as I respect you.”
Communication is key; if a person indicates they’re uncomfortable, it’s important to respect their wishes. We all deserve to have our personal boundaries respected.
Workplace Discrimination
“The all-women management team purposely gave the male staff uniforms that were a size too small so they could ogle *****. The button on my pants snapped off after my third shift because my pants were so tight, and they wouldn’t give me a replacement for three months. I was 16.”
Equality and fairness should be practiced in all workplaces. Just as it wouldn’t be okay for male management to do this to females, the reverse is also true.
Inappropriate Behaviour in Professional Situations
“My partner went to a job interview, and the older woman kept touching him as they talked, like on his arm or hand. I told him that’s not okay and he doesn’t have to take that. He said he didn’t want to make a scene because she might accuse him of harassment in retaliation, and she had his information.”
In any professional setting, physical contact should always be consensual and appropriate. An interview is not an invitation for personal contact, especially when unwanted.
Disrespectful Behaviour in Public
“My partner was at a truck stop waiting for his food when some lady came up and grabbed his junk. She just walked up and shoved her hand down his pants. He pushed her off, said he was taken, and told her to leave. She reached for him again and said, “Well, she isn’t here now, is she?”
Disrespectful and invasive actions are never okay, regardless of the circumstances. It’s crucial to treat everyone with respect.
Inappropriate Behaviour at Parties
“Randomly grabbing your private parts at parties. Feeling up a passed-out man. Telling you to take your shirt off, especially when it’s the first time they’ve met you.”
Parties are not an excuse for crossing boundaries. Everyone should feel safe and respected, no matter the situation.
Insensitivity and Stereotyping
“Calling a guy gay if he doesn’t want to sleep with them. Insist/assume that men always want to sleep with other people.”
Labeling or making assumptions based on a man’s personal decisions is unfair and unkind. Let’s remember to respect each other’s choices and privacy.
Online Harassment
“I’m a girl, but I’ve seen recent TikTok controversy where girls are making crude comments about a man’s private parts about men they find attractive. But only when men do it to them the other way around; it’s harassment, according to TikTok. Both of them are equally disgusting.”
Online platforms should be safe spaces for all users. Remember, if it’s not okay in person, it’s not okay online, and it’s time that social media companies realize this.
Workplace Discomfort
“I had a weird interaction at my last job. I was the only male manager in the company (and one of the youngest) during a weekly call with the other 18 managers. One of the women noticed I’d shaved since I had my camera on and pointed it out – to which I suddenly had a gaggle of women talking about how young and handsome it made me look. I legit had a 55 yr old woman tell me I was exactly the type of guy she would have been all over when she was my age, but maybe she can settle for me meeting her daughter (I’m married, and they all know this…). Then I had another woman tell me she would have to update her drawing now and proceeded to hold up a pencil drawing of my head with a heart around it. Needless to say, I never turned my camera on again, but I still got the odd “must be shy” or “we embarrassed him” followed by laughter.”
Just like women, men too can feel uncomfortable with unwarranted attention. A professional space should focus on work-related matters instead of how attractive someone is.
Unwanted Flirting
“Touching me, or “flirting” after I’ve said “no” or words to that effect. Also – servers? Brushing your breasts on my arm or shoulder makes me really uncomfortable and doesn’t lead to increased tips.”
Rejection should always be respected. Continuing to advance after being told ‘no’ is disrespectful and invasive. And respect works both ways in stores – not just for the workers!
Unfair Treatment in Training
“I am male, don’t like to blow my own trumpet, but I am a good-looking guy and very much in shape; I was harassed on a few occasions during my training to become a mental health nurse. Had my butt grabbed numerous times; our university wore tunics with popper buttons and had staff rip that open so my body was showing. When I was bending over or attending to patients being whistled at, and the cherry on the cake on a night out, a fellow female student (Lady about 45, I would have been 19ish at the time) grabbed my privates. When I qualified, it all stopped, but imagine this happened to a female. I never reported anything, but I was terrified it would have some negative impact on my career progression… student nurses are very good at being shy and quiet and almost feel like being intimidated when on placements.”
Any form of harassment is not acceptable, whether in the training or professional phase. Let’s strive for a respectful, fair, and safe environment for all.
Inappropriate Proposals
“One coworker invited me to fly to Las Vegas to attend a wedding with her. When I said my wife would likely have a problem with that, she said we could just tell her it was for work. Then comes the kicker, she said, “I am on birth control, so I can sleep with anyone.” She was actually pretty annoyed that I laughed in her face.”
Respect for a person’s relationship status is crucial. Making inappropriate suggestions can lead to uncomfortable situations and can strain professional relationships.
Misunderstanding about Boundaries
“Touching. For some reason, they clearly understand a man touching a woman is UNFAIR, but they don’t understand a woman touching a man is the same thing. Like the woman who touched Gaston. Too many people tried to defend her, saying she innocently touched him and “it’s not the same” as a man touching a woman like that.”
Respect for personal space and boundaries should be universal. It’s essential to remember that everyone deserves to be treated with respect and should have their personal space.
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